The 411 on Menswear

Let’s be honest, the main attraction is and will always be the bride on the wedding day but let’s put a little spotlight on that groom over there.  After all, he does make up 50% of the reason this wedding is taking place!

 

We are completely obsessed right now with men’s fashion!  Designers, trendsetters, fashion models and stylists have really set the bar high with what men are wearing these days and wedding days are no exception. That being said, we thought that it would be appropriate to let the men know that even if you think you’re looking fly, you need to pay attention to certain details of your wardrobe.  

 

Some key points to make sure that are just right:

  • Size 
  • Fit
  • Accessories

 

These are common points, right? 

Well yes, but each one is SOO important in every single way. 

 

Step 1: Go To a Tailor

Get your suit or tux fit perfectly.  Not everyone’s shape is made the same but every off the rack suit is so you should not be able to get away with going to the store and throwing something on from the rack.  Especially on a day like this. Trust us, the smallest alterations make a huge difference and smile on your wife’s face will be priceless!

 

Step 2: Know How Things Should Look 
Oversized pants, jackets, shirts, too long ties, too short ties, etc. etc. etc. ARE NOT OKAY. 🙂  Check the images here to see what is the right way to wearing these

 

 

So make sure you spend some time getting to know what your size is and familiarizing yourself with styles you like to make sure you look sharp. Getting an opinion or two doesn’t hurt either which actually brings us to our last step…

 

Step 3:  Consult with Others
Check-in with your bride, planner, or some lady in your life that you know has an eye for style! This way, you avoid making any embarrassing fashion no-no’s. You know that time you wanted to go out for dinner with that outfit you thought was amazing but your wife was like “ummmmm what are those?” Yeah, let’s not make that a thing that happens again when she’s walking down the aisle and sees you. Let’s make sure you’re looking like a total snack in her eyes 😉

 

So what’d you think? We’d love to know which of these steps you’ll be implementing (or all of them. Tell us in the comments below!

 

Second look for the groom? It may not be something many men think of, or even the ladies think of, but when looking back on it, it may make sense: Guys need a second look too. We all have those very fashionable, love to look good, care about their appearance, men in our lives. On the wedding day, it is likely no different. 

Guys – just like the ladies have an interest in having several looks, and that is perfectly fine with us, we want you to have an interest in a second look too. Actually, now that were on this topic, we are kind of obsessed with the idea of two looks for the bride and groom. Before we scare you away, a second look can be either extreme, subtle and sophisticated or even statement-making, it all works – that is when it is done the right way.

Here are a few suggestions and tips on helping your man pull this off:

Change The Jacket!

This is probably the easiest thing to do as it is simply a switch from one thing to another. When do you do this? The same time the ladies would make their switch. Plan for a specific look during the ceremony, something sharp, classic and that completely compliment the look of your face. Don’t know what she is wearing? (obviously, cause why would you) Ask for her opinion on it. It is likely that she won’t let you decide this all on your own anyways. 

Then make the switch right before your grand entrance into your ballroom IF you are going with something a little more fun and not too crazy. I say IF because if you are going with a look that is wild and totally speaks to your outgoing personality – I would hold off until the dancing begins. Bring out the cameras and your boys and make it known you are the guy for the night and now all eyes are on you.

Switch Up The Kicks 

We all know guys love their shoes and to be honest, some (or most) probably even have more tennis shoes in their closet than they know what to do with them. If you have a man that collects and takes pride in his shoe game, then why not show them off? Buy the best pair yet and put them to some real use – on that dance floor. It is certainly acceptable for you to make this minor wardrobe change when the lights go down and the music gets loud. Show off the shoe on you cause we are all here for a guy with a good shoe game!

So tell us! Which of these tips do you think your man will end up trying out? Comment your best guess below.

Typically low cut and shear is usually our go-to vibe when it comes to bridal gowns. But these days, we’re IN LOVE with gowns that have a high neckline. We know, we know. At first glance, high neckline gowns seem a little far off from where we usually fall on the sexy spectrum when it comes to weddings. But just because the neck is high, doesn’t mean you can’t also be sexy! Keep reading and fall in love with high necklines too. 

 

Elegance

Let’s start with elegance. A high neckline gown paired with an updo accentuates the neck and collar bones. We love sexy, always will. High neckline lets you drop it low, while at the same time cover-up. Just look at how Berta executed this look. 

Take a look at some of these looks. Once you’re done scrolling, we know you’ll agree. 

Spring Wedding + Inspo 

If we had to choose a season and vibe, for a high neckline gown, it would be spring wedding with a Lake Como vibe, pair with gold, satin cowl midi slip dress for the bridesmaids. 

 

 

 

High Neckline Designers We Love 

Some of the designers dong high necklines the right way are our usual favorite suspects–Berta, Mira Zwillinger, and Vera Wang. 

 

First up, Berta! We mentioned earlier that when you first think of high necklines, you think conservative. But not with Berta! Take a look at some of these sexy, high necklines. 

 

 

 

 

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@bertaprivee 🧡 Privée Collection Nº 2

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Made for royalty ❤️ #BERTA Milano collection.

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Next up, Mira Zwillinger. Check out these looks! 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Last but not lease, Vera Wang, who is always on-trend. 

 

 

 

 

 

Now have we convinced you yet? Comment below and let us know if you’re trying on a high neckline wedding gown the next time you go wedding dress shopping. 

As wedding planners, we work with a wide variety of couples. Each set has their own lives ahead of them and also their own agenda to prepare as they enter into this new life and this new beginning as husband and wife. 

For many of our couples, we have the experience of sharing in this journey with them and taking them through these times that are not necessarily just about planning a wedding but also planning trips, rerouting homes and traveling on the regular. Janay and Jamil are the epitome of that and a relationship experience that we feel it is important to highlight for those that are going through similar experiences like theirs. Keep reading for this Q&A from Janay Lampkin, future Mrs. Douglas. Drop a comment if you have any questions for Janay.

Tell us about yourself and your relationship, how long have you been dating? 

Jamil and I are “college sweethearts” and have been together for 8 years! We met early on in college and the rest was history. We’ve been together through degrees, career changes, pitfalls and promotions. It really feels like two relationships wrapped up in one. It’s been a wild ride but I wouldn’t change one detail.

 

How many times have you moved throughout your relationship? 

Whew. this is a triggering question 🙂 I think between the two of us we’ve moved once per year throughout our entire relationship. Keep in mind, throughout college we moved within the same city. We didn’t start moving to new states until our careers forced us to. So in the last 5 years we’ve moved once during season and then typically we spend off seasons in AZ — I’ve lost count, okay? 🙂

How many times have you moved since being engaged? 

Twice!

Has moving interfered in wedding planning at all? If so, please explain (setting dates, scheduling important wedding planning meetings, juggling daily routines, etc). 

Honestly, not as much as you’d think. At first, it took us some time to get used to ALL of the moving pieces but having BTS has helped us to really put the entire process into perspective. We got engaged literally weeks before camp, so I pretty much knew that there would be minimal planning until season was well underway. We’ve really embraced shared calendars, deadlines, and he’s been the best brainstorming partner. Ladies: let your man weigh in on the different details, it’s actually way more fun that way!

 

Aside from moving, have you experienced any other life changes during your engagement period (job changes, family happenings, baby planning, new pets)? How have those life changes impacted wedding planning? 

I decided to leave the corporate style career and explore my industry as a full-time digital marketing + content consultant so that I could be remote and full time be physically in the same place as my Fiancé. By the time we were engaged, I was pretty accustomed to fully working remotely and was in a pretty good routine. about 2 months into our engagement we found out we were being signed to TN so I essentially hit the pause button on wedding stuff so I could pack up a five-bedroom house and get us settled in a brand new city. But looking back, wedding planning was made so much easier with planners, It was stressful but so doable.

What are the biggest challenges in juggling regular life and wedding planning? 

Wedding planning really started to pick up in off-season (Thank God) so we’ve been so blessed to be in the same city as our planners making meetings and communication 10x easier. There is a lot of decision making so it’s been tricky to just hone in on one decision while also continuing to be conscious of budgets. I would say one big challenge that I wasn’t expecting are all of the opinions. If you are a natural “people pleaser” wedding planning will be challenging at first. But eventually, you get really good at focusing on what you and your partner value most and just shrugging your shoulders at all the other noise.

 

While moving around, have you and your partner had to deal with long-distance? 

Very, very brief long-distance (2 months max). Football is definitely a year-round thing so there are definitely a few weeks where he will have to go back for training and I hold down the fort with our dog and coordinate the visits so that can eliminate all of the unnecessary logistics that come with dog parenting. We’ve found our groove so it really doesn’t feel like a chore at this point!

What is the biggest struggle with moving around often, wedding planning, work-life balance and maintaining a healthy relationship? How do you overcome the challenges that come along with the above? 

Over communicating, checking in, and communicating some more. There are so many moving pieces and deadlines and task lists. You can probably tell by now that I am VERY type-A. I live for a shared calendar, to-do list, and planner and legit have to remind myself to check in with myself and my fiancé. Checking in on each other is something we’ve always prioritized and I truly believe it’s made the process so much more stress-free.

 

What are you most looking forward to after the wedding? 

The marriage part 🙂 While the wedding planning process has been very exciting and special, we are both so much more excited to just be married and to pour into our union and family.

 

What advice do you think your partner would give to other grooms in the same situation?
ha! He would probably say there are a ton of deadlines and lots of money spent so plan accordingly and enjoy the ride 🙂

What is the best advice for other brides going through the same or similar changes that you have or are going through? 

To remind yourself that It’s a blessing. Whether you are having a giant wedding with a guest list of 300 or a more intimate wedding with less than 100 people, it’s about you and your person. As long as you are both present, happy and celebrating each other and this amazing life change, it will all come together no matter the cross-country move, curveball, or life change!

 

We hope feel like you’re a part of Janay’s journey. We can’t wait to share more details with you on her venue, decor and so much more. Don’t forget to head over to She Said Yes podcast to listen to Janay’s episode! 

 

Trending now is clear heels. Not only do we love the look of them, but we also love the way they fit and feel. Designers seemed to have perfected the non-foggy look. Ladies, you know what we’re talking about, where the shoes fog up the clear portion of the heels. LOL Ok, back to clear heels and why we love them. 

They are so simple and chic and elongate every woman’s legs. Who is here for the Barbi leg look? WE ARE! As an everyday look or style to going out for dinner and drinks, to bridesmaids and bridal shoes – they are the perfect fit for any lady’s foot. Not to mention, they do give us a little Cinderella glass slipper vibe.

 

We know, it is likely that KIM K started this trend a few years ago but we are here to tell you, if you haven’t already, buy a pair. Take a look for yourself and see why. 

 

 

 

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Share some clear love. #BECAUSESCHUTZ

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Which one of these is your favorite? Tell us in the comments below!

 

 

 

As a bride, there are so many items on your checklist that you will want to cross out the month leading up to the wedding but in preparation for the 30-day countdown, let’s make our own list so that you can stay on track with your self-love prior to the big day!

Here are our top ten things to make sure you check off your list:

 

Exfoliate and brighten up that face 

You want to make sure you are GLOWING on your wedding day. This is not something you want to start on the week of the wedding. Begin your face care practice well in advance so you know exactly what your skin can take. The last thing you will want walking down the aisle is a breakout or big red rash! Consult with your aesthetician for the best plan for you!

 

Paws and Claws

Head to the salon or pick out a few of your top color picks! Give yourself some time to wear the color before you commit to the wedding. Once you decide, get those paws and claws done days before.

 

To Tan or Not to Tan! 

Your wedding week isn’t the time to get a spray tan for the first time, ever. If you are wanting that tan look for your wedding day, look into getting one prior to gauge if it’s a yes or a no.

 

Pamper Those Pearly Whites

I say this word just like my daughter, big smile and all pearls showing. NOTHING is worse than getting pictures and your teeth are looking a little yellow. This is not just for the ladies but for the hubs to be as well. Make an appointment with your dentist to get a quick clean up and whitening or make a pact to complete those crest white strips. A little effort goes a LONNNGGGG way here.

 

Botox Babe 

Full believers over here of a smooth forehead and no lines. Botox takes at least 5 days to kick in fully. If you have a regimen already started, contact your specialist and see if you can get in early to make sure your wrinkles are no more. If this is your first time, give yourself time! 30 days in advance is perfect.

 

Get Those Hair Color Touch Ups

Only you know how fast your hair grows and if you have an extreme amount of color growth, it’s probably the time to get things figured out. Highlights or retouches, they are so important – do this about 7-10 days out.

 

Eat Cleaner 

Now, this isn’t something that is new to people. If you haven’t really been following a plan during the months leading up to the big day, make sure you figure this out 30 days in advance. Don’t hold back, eat what you want but at the same time, keep it in moderation. The goal is not to starve yourself, the goal is to feel good, right? Good food makes you feel good–Promise!

 

Exercise Consistently

1 and 2 and 3 and 4 and get them sit ups right and . . . move ya body! Get in the gym, go out for a walk, take a hike, swim, bike, etc. You don’t need to have long sessions, 30 minutes is great but a little goes a long way in feeling sexy. We have a workout plan you can download if you’re looking for some gym workouts. You can find our program here! Here’s a tip. Do it with your bridesmaids, they’ll love it! 

 

I Do Thrive


Get Some Sleep
7-8 hours of sleep per night is known for many things; controls hunger, it helps your immune system’s functionality, and memory retention just to name a few. All of these being important for your wedding day. Set schedules, get a new pillow if you need, cool down that bedroom and get those hours in!

 

Stay Hydrated
1. Helps prevent hangovers
2. Helps with weight loss
3. Increases energy levels
4. Helps maximize physical performance 😉

 

Which of these items on our checklist do you need to work on more for your big day? Comment below!

 

We’re feeling ultra-inspired from curating our list of summer honeymoon must-haves. So we made another list, another addition to the must-have file in your bookmarks, with lipstick colors that will make sure your lips get all the attention they deserve. It’s time to put away that dark plum or red color because this season, bright pops of color are what #hotgirlsummers are made of.

Here are some of our all-time faves that pair perfectly with honeymoon swimsuit or your rehearsal dinner dress!

 

Tom Ford’s Lip Gelee in Maldives

 

Charlotte Tilbury’s Hot Lips in Electric Poppy

 

 

Yves Saint Laurent’s Rouge Pur Couture Matte Lipstick in Fuchsia Fetic

 

 

Lancome’s L’Absolu Rouge Drama Matte in Obsessive Red

 



MAC Cosmetic’s Matte Lipstick in Lady Danger

 

Tom Ford’s Lip Gelee in Sunlit

 

MAC Cosmetic’s Matte Lipstick in Red Rock

 

 

Charlotte Tilbury’s Hot Lips in Tell Laura

 

 

Yves Saint Laurent’s Glossy Stain Lip Color in Rouge Gouache

 

We love hearing your thoughts! Tell us below, which of these colors will you be showing off on your summer vacay?

Summer is about to get so much hotter and, no, we’re not talking about the weather. Hint, hint, it’s you! So raise your hand if you’re prepping for that summer honeymoon vacay! We’ve got you covered with some essentials that will make you feel like a Victoria’s Secret bombshell from the beach to your dinner reservations.

 

Oh and if you’re also looking for a little something to spice things up in the hotel room, you’re going to also want to read all about Rihanna’s Fenty bridal box. She’s got your backside.

Be warned, your boo’s jaw will drop…

The Outfits

 

Ready to rock those gorgeous curves? The Sade Bikini takes beach style to another level with its unique wraparound styling and thick straps to make sure everything stays safe and comfy.

 

Don’t want a two-piece but still want to keep that element of sexiness? The Kristin One Piece is exactly what you need. This pristine white suit has gorgeous ribbed fabric that feels like anything but basic. You’ll have modest back coverage and a peek-a-boo side for that extra oompf.

 

 

No matter what you pick, you can’t forget to add in a cute tunic, like the Crinkle Twill Beach Tunic, to arrive in style. Button it up or leave it open, how much coverage you want is your choice.

Need some styling inspo for these swimsuits and tunic? Add on Valentino’s Garavani Go slides for the ultra-luxe look.

 

Own that sunkissed look in style for some evening cocktails in the flirty Fuel Your Fire dress. The fit and flare style of the dress and its floral pattern will accentuate your gorgeous figure making you feel ready to own whatever room you walk into. Complete the look with Steve Madden’s Charlee Clear heels and the super cute beaded tote in the accessories inspo below!

 

The Accessories


Pack up your phone, sunscreen, and snacks in style with the Wood You Handle This bag. We love the ivory but if you want to add a pop of color to the outfits, the bag is also available in black, tan, and mauve.

 

Let’s be honest, who doesn’t love finding the perfect accessory? Whether you’re going for a casual look or dressing up a little, this tote has you covered. Boho babes, you’ll love the beaded, mirrored, and fringed details throughout.

 

We love splurging but, let’s be real, we also love finding a bargain! Stay fashionably safe from harmful UV rays in the Sense The Ton Sun Hat. This hat plus the swimsuits and tunic will have you looking like your ready for your own 2-page spread in a magazine.

 

So what do you say ladies, how would you mix and match these curated styles to build your perfect beachy honeymoon look? Comment below!

Whether you want to cover up in style or just want to switch up the look from ceremony to reception. Detachable sleeves are an easy way to create a unique, versatile, and mesmerizing look for your big day with a variety of options ranging from floor length to flared sleeves.

So brides, get ready because we’ve rounded up 5 absolutely gorgeous styles that’ll wow you and all your guests!

Kara Gown by Enzoani

Were you the little girl who really felt those Disney fairytale stories deeply in her soul? We know you’re a boss queen but a girl deserves to be pampered! If that sounds like you, we picked this sweet and delicate beaded lace gown by Enzoani just for you. You won’t have to worry about an unflattering fit with the patterned lace at the waist creating a figure-flattering style. Fit for your real life fairytale love story, the delicate off-the-shoulder detachable cap sleeves will take you from “I do” to let’s dance. This look would pair beautifully with an untamed topknot and a pair of dangly beaded earrings.

Barcelona 2020 Collection by Julie Vino

Calling all señoritas! The Barcelona 2020 collection by Julie Vino elegantly balances a sexy flirty vibe with a flair of elegance that’ll have you feeling like Spanish royalty. You’ll feel like a kid in a candy store with a variety of options for sleeves. Choose from flowy floor-length detachable sleeves that’ll have you feeling angelic or lace sleeves in either a cap sleeve style or fitted long sleeve. No matter which you pick, these styles would look amazing paired with a wavy hairstyle and delicate diamond hoop earrings.

Chanté by Pallas Cuture

Have a thing for classic couture with a twist of ultra-feminine modern sophistication? Then Pallas Couture and its Chanté gown will speak to your soul! It’s impossible to not feel magical and beautiful in this gown with gorgeous features such as the tulle train, tasteful peek-a-boo lace, fitted corset-like top to show off your figure, and the flowy embroidered detachable sleeves. With all the gorgeous detail, less is more when it comes to doing hair and makeup for the perfect complete look. We suggest a loose braid while confidently rocking a natural makeup look with a subtle rosy pop of lip color.

F/W 2019 by Berta

If you’re a lover of avantgarde fashion, specifically for looks that mesh sexy modern styles with retro styles and vintage materials, you’ll love Berta’s F/W 2019 collection. Style 19-107 in this collection is a fit and flare gown with lace embroidery, handcrafted tulle, and shoulder lace detail on its detachable sleeves. It’s a fashion-forward look that maintains an element of timelessness to it. Style your hair straight or wavy with your makeup pulling off that natural effortless look.

Tullia by Galia Lahav

 

A gown perfect for the bride looking for more coverage without sacrificing flaunting her gorgeous curves and feminine energy. The Tullia gown by Israeli fashion designer, Galia Lahav, is a work of art by itself and with you in it that’s a masterpiece. From the tan dusted ivory fabric to its dramatic lace details along the sides and detachable sleeves, you will look and feel flawless. Top off the look with a loose updo, smokey eye, and pear line drop earrings for absolute perfection.

 

Now it’s your turn to tell us what you think. Of all the carefully curated dresses we found for all our gorgeous BTS babes, which do you love the most? Comment below!

Pre-wedding boudoir shoot, an opportunity to celebrate your body with your husband, or husband to be. We’re here to advocate for a boudoir shoot by breaking down misconceptions that discourage brides from doing a boudoir shoot. If we’re being honest, us ladies aren’t celebrating our bodies enough these days. While we love a good, sexy pic we’ve brought in a specialist to help us advocate for more skin!

Alyssa, the photographer behind Photography by Alyssa Michelle is breaking down 10 of the most common misconceptions that discourage brides from taking a boudoir shoot. Alyssa can be contacted at photographybyalyssamichelle@gmail.com.

  1. I need to lose 10 pounds first

Actually, you are beautiful just the way you are. You don’t need to lose weight to fit into your wedding dress, you don’t need to lose weight immediately after having a child, and you definitely don’t need to lose weight for your boudoir session. Why? Because that is defeating the purpose. Boudoir is about learning to reconnect with your body and learn to love yourself for exactly how you are. Bonus tip: Losing 10, 20, 30 lbs won’t affect your photos in any way. A professional boudoir photographer will know how to show you in your best light, period.

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One time about a year ago, I was on a plane on my way home from a business trip. I remember the cabin smelling like alcohol and sweat… It was a rough ride. I remember thinking, it's going to be a long flight, I better get some work done. So I pulled out my laptop and started doing some social media planning and then moved onto editing. I had just shot 3 sessions on the trip, so I thought why not get ahead of the game. About an hour rolls by and I take a small break, stretch and before I get back to it, I turn over my shoulder because I felt weird. To my surprise… I had an audience. Boudoir is so normal to me, that I forgot how not normal it is to the average person. P.s. I always make sure if I ever edit in a public space that the client has already signed a release. Hehe! So I close my laptop, and try and read a book. Then finally we land and all of a sudden I hear, "hey, are you Alyssa Michelle?" and the girl who sat next to me was staring at me. I said yes, and then all of the girls behind me were like "I knew it!" so all 6 girls who were traveling together, knew who I was, and needless to say, I booked 6 shoots on an airplane… One of my favorite moments of my life. #boudoir #photographybyalyssamichelle #laboudoir #losangelesboudoir #femaleboudoirphotographer #intimateportraitphotographer #femaleentrepreneur #value #boudoirvalue #bossbabe #girlpower #empowerment #femaleboss #learningtoloveyourself #feminineenergy #takecareofyou #selflove #dtsa #southerncaboudoir #socalphotographer #beautyphotographer #badass #badassbabes #fearless

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  1. I’m not sexy

Or, you just don’t know how to pull your sexy out! That’s your photographers job, not yours! Most women have no idea how to be “sexy” but really, we all are naturally. You just need someone to show you your version of sexy. We all have a goddess inside us waiting to be unleashed, and I promise you, it’s easier than you think to pull her out.

  1. I’m too shy

Most women are shy about their bodies, but that doesn’t mean you can’t do it. It just means you need a photographer that you connect with, and love their message. Just know that your photographer works with hundreds of women, and they have seen all personalities, body types, body parts etc. We aren’t here to judge you, we are here to take you outside of your comfort zone to show you how amazing you are.

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The people who hold their chin up the highest may be the most self-conscious. The ones who smile the brightest may be hurting the deepest. And the one's who say they're ok, may be one step away from breaking down. You can never tell what someone is going through from the outside. Your story is important. Boudoir is for every woman, and can be that boost of confidence you need when you falter, the pick me up when things keep going wrong, or a life-saver in some of the most dire of cases. Please share your stories with us. You never know who may be inspired by your journey. #badasswomen #boudoir #photographybyalyssamichelle #alyssamichelleboudoir #badassgirls #badassery #strongwomen #womenbuildingwomenup #orangecounty #orangecountyboudoir #ocboudoirstudio #intimateboudoirphotographer #badassmoms #badassclub #alisoviejoboudoir #lakeforestboudoir #costamesaboudoir #sandiegoboudoir #boudoirinspo

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  1. I don’t want them on the internet

Not a problem at all, there is no requirement to sign a model release. You can keep your images 100% private if you choose and your photographer will never share any images without your written consent. Also, keep in mind when reading over your contract before you book your session, understand the difference between “Copyright” and “Print Release” Most clients get confused between the two, especially since photographers keep the copyright to all photographs taken and the copyright is not for sale, and if your photographer is willing to sell it to you, it will be a commercial price, and rather expensive. Copyright belonging to the photographer does not mean that they have the right to post your photos, all it means is that they retain that they are the creator of those images. Copyright prevents the client from claiming that they are the creator of said images. Print release is when your photographer allows you to do almost whatever you want with your images. Post them, print them on your own (which I do not recommend, always go through your photographer!), etc. You just cannot claim the art as your own. Sometimes photographers require that if you post them that you tag them, I don’t do this personally, but some do.

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The season of sheer fabrics and lace details. The time for church bells and rice throwing. The fleeting moment of catching a glimpse before one of the most important commitments of your life. Wedding season is upon us, and I have a funny statistic for you… Only about 10-12% of my clientele are brides. But I still get the occasional, "what do you do"? And I'll tell them and their first response would be, "awww what a great gift for their grooms!" Then when I explain that about 50% of my clients are not in a relationship their jaws drop. I explain to them that a majority of my clients are women who have been mistreated, abused, going through a trauma, a divorce, a disease. I say that this experience, although truly an incredible gift, is meant for my client and nobody else unless she chooses to share it with others. Your well being, your mental health, and your self appreciation are the most important things that you can nurture in this life. That's exactly why I'm here, to help you connect with those things. Now, who here is a bride, who is married, and who is a single babe?! Tell me in the comments! #boudoir #boudoirphotography #sensual #portrait #intimateportraits #storyteller #documentselflove #queen #orangecountyboudoir #womenempowerment #empoweringportraits #treatyourself #soul #studiosession #boudoirinspiration #bodypositivity #boudoirart #caboudoir #somethingboudoir #luxuryboudoir #luxuryboudoirexperience #californiabride #bridalboudoir #photographybyalyssamichelle

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  1. I’m too old

There is never an age that you stop deserving self-love. I’ve photographed an 89-year-old babe and she KILLED her shoot. Your age is just as useless as the number on the scale when it comes to boudoir. It’s not important in the slightest and DEFINITELY does not determine your ability or worth.

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I recently ran into an old Jr. High friend at the grocery while of course starving, and shopping for food, which is a really bad combo. My hair was a complete disaster, zero makeup, and I was in sweatpants. (I know I know, I promise I'll never do it again). This old friend, let's call her Marissa, stopped me and said, "Alyssa?? Oh my god, Alyssa Nicolai!" Now granted, it took me a moment to look up from the tortilla chips and really focus in my energy to start to comprehend what was going on, but eventually I realized who it was. We chatted in that damn chip aisle for what seemed like an eternity (since you know, ravenous hungry woman is not the best state for me) and then she handed me her business card and said, "it looks like you are having a hard time do please call me if you ever need my services, I would be happy to help" I was caught off guard a bit but said goodbye. Gave her a hug and went about my tortilla chip decision. Something bothered me though… "it looks like you are having a hard time"… What the fuck was that supposed to mean? I pulled out the business card and there it was, "Marissa, financial advisor, getting you back on the right track" My jaw dropped. She thinks I'm struggling financially?! What the hell did I do to give off that impression? (cue the magical mirror that appeared in front of me that showed me exactly why she thought that way) The more I wandered the aisles the more irritated I became. The truth of the matter is, you have no idea what someone is going through, or how successful someone is by the way they dress. Sure, I was a damn mess, but that's only because I had worked 60 days in a row, and she happened to catch me on my ONE day off where I didn't leave bed other than to eat. Judging ones status by appearances is something I have learned to combat. Take a look at the people in the store and know that the people that pass by are most likely in an extremely different situation than you might think. Human psychology is so damn interesting. Moral of the story, you have no idea how someone's life is playing out by one moment in passing. Give grace. Has something like this ever happened to you? #lifestory

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  1. I don’t know how to pose

GOOD. No, really… good. The more blank slate, the better. Your photographer will pose you from head to toe. We are the professionals and the artists. We have a vision for you, and it’s better when you don’t know how to pose so we can do that part for you! I know for my clients, it’s so easy for me to jump on the bed and SHOW them exactly what pose I want!

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When my clients tell me they are thinking about going nude I do a happy dance. Going nude is one of the most powerful and empowering feelings on this planet. You literally shed the insecurities and the weight of doubt away. It's okay to feel vulnerable, it's okay to feel naked, it's okay to strip down those walls and start to rebuild stronger. You have more fight in you that you think girl. In the comments, tell me if you are thinking about going nude for your session or if you did! #boudiebabe #photographybyalyssamichelle #boudoir #ocboudoir #santaanaboudoir #santaanaboudoirphotographer #santaanaboudoirstudio #santaanaboudoirphotography #downtownsantaanaboudoir #intimatestoryteller #intimates #lovelingerie #intimatesscene #intimatesession #intimatestories #boudoircollective #boudoirbabes #boudoirbabe #bootybabes #allhailthebooty #selfloveisthebestlove #bestboudoir

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  1. It’s vain of me to hang photos of myself around the house

It’s vain of you to love yourself, cherish yourself, and take care of yourself? I don’t think so. What other people think of you, is frankly, none of your business. You do you boo. If hanging beautiful artwork of yourself in the house to remind you every single day that you are beautiful just how you are, makes you happy… then just do it.

  1. I’m not photogenic

I’m going to tell you a secret. There is no such thing as photogenic and non-photogenic. Everybody is just as beautiful as everybody else. The art of photographing someone or oneself is an art, and it’s not easy. So if you feel like you are “non-photogenic” that most likely means you just need a professional to show you in your best light.

  1. My partner will not like me doing a boudoir shoot

Boudoir should always first and foremost be for YOU. It is your body, your choice, and your reasons why you want to pamper yourself. As long as you tell your partner that your boudoir session is empowering, and will build confidence then your partner should respect that.

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The answer to everyone's question is "Yes, absolutely, whole-heartedly, yes". The question? "Alyssa, do you honestly still love what you do after 14 years?" I get asked this question fairly often. I mean, imagine doing the same thing every single day for 14 years, how the hell could I still love it as much as I do? The answer is simple… Every single day is different, every single client is unique, and I get to watch babes transform from an unsure, shy, self-conscious woman, to a ravishing, sure of herself, confident babe. So sure, I go to the same studio every morning, I drive the same route, I set up the same, but that doesn't mean that my day is the same. Everyday is a new opportunity to meet someone new, create life changing memories, and provide and experience tailored specifically to each individual client. So in closing… Yes… I still love my job after 14 years, now more than ever. #bossbabe #girlpower #photographybyalyssamichelle #selflove #womenempowerment #femaleboss #learningtoloveyourself #beproud #femaleboudoirphotographer #ocboudoir

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  1. I can’t afford it / It’s too expensive

Is Boudoir cheap? No. But life-changing experiences aren’t. Many photographers offer amazing payment plan options that make the experience and products completely affordable. Just ask your photographer what their policies are on the plans! I offer a Boudie Bank to my clients, which allows them to pre-pay any amount towards their products before their session. I also offer regular payment plans for up to 18 months. All photographers will offer different options, but note that it’s important that you don’t just price shop boudoir photographers. Boudoir is the most intimate form of photography, and it’s imperative that you go with someone you love, trust, and admire. Price should be secondary, and professional boudoir photography is 100% worth the price.

Now that we’ve cleared that up, comment below if you’re planning a boudoir shoot!