Perhaps you and your soon to be spouse already have children together or maybe there are children from previous relationships. Whatever the case may be, when you get married, it is a unity ceremony for all of you, not just the couple.
To ensure your children always feel as if they are part of the master plan and that their needs matter, include them in the wedding. Just as the bride and groom feel a bond forming at the wedding, the children will feel the same way. The special and unique experience signifies that you are now a blended family.
Write vows to the children
Each parent should write special vows that they read to the children as part of the wedding. This is a great way to show that this is a group effort and that everyone is on the same team.
Let the kids lead the way
This part of the ceremony can be designed to fit the family. The basic concept is a child leads the bride and a child waits with the groom. Of course, all the kids can lead the way or they can even wear a sash or hold a flag that reads, “Here comes my mommy!” Dress them appropriately for the wedding. They can be junior bridesmaids or junior brides. You can find the right styles at Azazie.com.
Group unity candles
Instead of the traditional single candle for the bride and single candle for the groom, which they use to light one candle and extinguish the others, have candles for each child. Assist each child into lighting their own candle, then light the family candle from them. The children can then help extinguish the small candles.
A sweet twist on this is to give each child a small jar of colored sand. Mom and dad have larger jars, each person with their own color. The sands are poured one at a time into a larger jar, making a beautiful sand art that represents a blended family.
The kids can help set up the wedding registry
Explain the concept of an online wedding registry like Plumfund, to the children. Let them help you decide what to ask for in the gifts. Instead of traditional gifts, you may want a family entertainment center. The kids can help you choose what you want and if they are old enough, they can watch as the gifts come in and you get closer to your family wedding gifts. Plumfund is free to use for you and your guests.
Include them in the cake
Traditionally, the figurines of the bride and groom are placed at the top of the wedding cake. Why not choose other figurines in the likeness of the children and place them around the cake in strategic places. If the kids are old enough you can even give them each a small cake to serve at the reception.
Other ways kids can help
- They can serve as ushers.
- They can man the guest’s book.
- Give them disposable cameras and let them take pictures.
- Children have a unique perspective, you could get some great shots.
- They can collect the flowers in a small cart or wagon after the wedding to donate to the local nursing home.
- Some kids love to sing and dance and what better way to open the reception that with some entertainment.
Use your imagination to merge your children into your wedding. This is a big day for all of you and this symbol of solidarity will help put you on the right path. Sure they could make a mistake. They are children. But that is just part of what makes them great and it will make for some great stories in your future.
Author, Wendy Dessler, is super-connector with Outreachmama who helps businesses find their audience online through outreach, partnerships, and networking. She frequently writes about the latest advancements in digital marketing and focuses her efforts on developing customized blogger outreach plans depending on the industry and competition.