We all know planning a wedding can be stressful! Managing all of the moving parts of your wedding, communicating the details to your family and friends, and being the main point of contact for just about EVERYONE can be a lot to handle. So take this already stressful time and throw in a HUGE plot twist called Corona Virus and now we really have a boiling pot.
The time we are all living in now, has brought so much uncertainty and fear to just about everyone in every area and has really thrown the wedding and event industry for a loop. Wedding and event dates are constantly changing, couples are unhappy, honeymoons are being postponed, bridal showers and bachelorette/bachelor parties are being canceled, it’s just an absolute whirlwind. No one knows what the future holds later on in the year making the “what ifs” endless and the uncertainty through the roof.
All conversation topics seem to revolve around covid-19, especially when It comes to people speaking with anyone they know that is planning a wedding. Sometimes the questions and opinions get a little overwhelming for our already overwhelmed brides. So we wanted to write this blog to hopefully spread some awareness on what NOT to say when you are trying to be empathetic and console couples planning a wedding during this time.
5 things not to say:
- So are you still getting married? For the love of everything, please do not ask this question. It just reminds everyone of the uncertainty that everything wedding related is up in the air. If the wedding was canceled or postponed, you would already know, so no need to ask.
- Aren’t you scared about moving forward with your wedding? Yes, of course the couple is still worried about this. Again, no need to ask the question.
- Well how are you going to get your dress? Dresses are still shipping, designers are still designing, boutiques are still taking private appointments in some areas, and life is still moving forward. No need to suggest stress in this area when things are all worked out.
- Why don’t you just elope? Easy answer there, if the couple wanted to elope….they would elope. Trust me, you are not the first person to think of this lol.
- What are you so worried about, my cousin’s uncle’s boss said this is literally going to pass by next weekend. Sir, thank you for this info, I am sure said person is a total genius and has all the answers to life. But let’s be realistic, no one knows what is going on and no one knows what will happen later in the year so please try your hardest to refrain from suggesting what the future holds.
We talk to our brides all the time about what they are going through, things that have been irritating, and topics of discussion they’d rather avoid. The main trend in these conversations seems to be that brides really don’t want your opinions on this topic. There is a 100% chance they have put a lot of thought into what is best for them and talked over their own personal decisions with everyone that they need to talk this over with.
We really recommend avoiding the act of suggesting your opinions. Be mindful of what you are saying to these couples who are already dealing with so much. Keep in mind that your simple question, may actually not be that simple and could potentially be the breaking point to someone who is going through the possibility of not having his or her special day that they have dreamed about for lord knows how long.
Here are some great take away questions that we recommend asking instead of the list above:
1. How are you feeling today?
2. Whats the most exciting thing you are working on for your wedding right now?
3. Have you been working on writing your vows? This is probably the perfect time to get going on these!
4. Tell me about your wedding dress or tux/suit, I can NOT wait to see It!!
5. Have you and your bridesmaids/groomsmen been doing any virtual workouts? I hear this is a great stress reliever.
We are all going through uncertain times right now, and I whole heartedly believe that no one is intentionally trying to be hurtful or unhelpful. This is exactly why we created this blog! We want to spread awareness and help people understand some of the trials and tribulations our couples are experiencing. We want to shed some light on how some people might be feeling.
If you are engaged and looking for a way to shed some light on how you’ve been feeling about all the Covid Questions…feel free to share this post 🙂